Tears in Heaven

Do you think there are tears in Heaven?
I wonder if angels cry.
What would constitute sadness
up in the heavenly sky.

Looking down upon our world
with all its stress and strife,
might make the saints and angels grieve
over all the wasted life

Even our Heavenly Father
might shed a teardrop or two,
that we've ignored His commandment,
"Love one another, as I have loved you."

"Tears in Heaven" is a ballad written by Eric Clapton and Will Jennings about the pain Clapton felt following the death of his four-year-old son, Conor, who fell out of a 53rd-story window in his mother's friend's New York City apartment, on March 20, 1991. Clapton, who arrived at the apartment shortly after the accident was visibly distraught for months afterwards. This song is one of Clapton's most successful, reaching #2 on the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart in the U.S. The song also spent three weeks at #1 on the American adult contemporary chart in 1992.

Clapton stopped playing this song in 2004, he explained: "I didn't feel the loss anymore, which is so much a part of performing those songs. I really have to connect with the feelings that were there when I wrote them. They're kind of gone and I really don't want them to come back, particularly. My life is different now. They probably just need a rest and maybe I'll introduce them for a much more detached point of view."

Bohater

Great spirits have always encountered
violent opposition from mediocre minds.

Albert Einstein

作為超人的條件是什麼？擁有不依常規的想法? 異同尋常的能力? 可是當天賦要被逼隱藏的時候，天生異品和天生缺陷到底有什麼不同?

已為人母的女超人說：「每個人都是特別的。」超人兒子卻賭氣道：「這表示沒有人是特別的。」然而這句賭氣的話，卻正中了問題的核心： 身為超人的一員，不但不能盡情地表現自我，反而要壓制自己的能力、努力地表現「平凡」，這個世界的超人，命運其實和罪犯差不多，都擁有不依常規的想法，都被認為對社會有害，只差的是超人以大眾的利益為先，罪犯卻往往只為一己私慾而行事。

而長大後的超能小子 Syndrome (這個字，有徵候群、特殊現象的意思)，雖然平庸但擁有一點點的小聰明，卻滿有罪犯的私慾，狂妄地說：「當人人都是超人時，就沒有超人了。」這平庸而變態角色的心聲，其實來自所有嫌棄、看輕自己的人，表面上有了新的驕傲，實際上面對的依舊是深深的自卑，他必須靠著毀滅高超的他者才能滿足，而他的破壞欲不可能被滿足，也不可能有所結束，因為那是他生活的所有意義，他不可能獲得他口中的新生活，因為毀滅超級英雄以建立自我，才是他的存在價值。但是超能小子有這種罪犯的私慾，可也是因為他自覺平庸，而被內心的空洞所吞噬，由於處處比不上真正的超人，於是想方設法的想要超越超人，能力不遞就只能用卑劣手段達成自己的慾望，最後 Syndrome 毀了自己的一生，連小命也丟了；於是引起的問題是，追尋自我的限度到底在哪裡？超人到底能以什麼形態與平凡共存？

再想深一層，超人和 Syndrome 又有何不同？他們不是都崇拜異能、都想站在世界的頂端膜拜著自我，而面臨著失去更珍貴事物的危機嗎？
　　

Elephant never forgets ...

'An elephant never forgets' is a saying, so if a person has a memory like an elephant, he or she has a very good memory indeed.

The origin of the phrase seems to go back to observations that elephants follow the same paths and even hand down genetic memories of directions and places grounds across generations. Each elephant clan has a certain burial place, like many human communities, and always help the dying ones get back there if they are not killed traumatically first.

The most famous example of the tenacity of memory of elephants is illustrated in the story "Elephant Walk," which was made into a movie in the 40s, or perhaps early 50s. This is the true story of a British colonial villa which was built across a traditional elephant walk in India. The elephants were confused and enraged to find their way blocked, and every year at the same time, the villa staff would have to defend the villa and deflect the herds around it so they could get from one side of the offending villa in their traditional migration.

Finally the elephants could not be dissuaded, and one year in rage they finally stormed on through the villa, destroying it and killing many of the people, restoring the traditional road.

In addition to their travel and burial patterns, it has been demonstrated in the 20th century that elephants also have a high friendship skill with humans, as well as develping lasting relationships with other elephants, and in fact do remember individuals of the human and their own species even when separated for decades.

　　

逢其欲 ...

紹興十年 (1140 年)，宋軍與金兵激戰於順昌、郾城等地，連獲大捷。兩河義軍紛起響應，金兵聞風喪膽。值此良機，岳飛上書急奏高宗趙構：『此正是陛下中興之時，乃金賊滅亡之日。』正當他擬揮師北進，恢復河朔，一雪靖康之恥之際，卻在一天內接到宋廷十二道金牌，嚴令大軍班師。隨之，他本人也被召回臨安，解除了兵權。岳飛的 10 年抗金之功，頓時毀於一旦。

紹興十一年 (1141 年) 十月，岳飛被秦檜等誣以謀反罪身入囹圄。同年十二月二十九日，宋金紹興和議訂立不過一月，他便被趙構賜死在大理寺獄內。死訊傳出，『天下聞者無不垂涕，下至三尺之童，皆怨秦檜。』秦檜是害死岳飛的元兇，是時人眾口一詞的結論。秦檜死後倒也有人為他夫婦倆各塑有一鐵像，就在西湖岳廟前，跪了岳武穆幾百年的一堆臭鐵。他做了臭鐵也還罷了，偏有人也做了一聯，還要為臭鐵鳴冤:

『青山有幸埋忠骨，白鐵無辜鑄侫臣。』

使秦檜狡殺岳飛的說法，成了不容更改的鐵案。其實秦檜本也是個飽讀四書五經的人，又寫得一手好書法，十年寒窗後得中了狀元，官至一品，但是這位學而優則仕的才子，在史家和百姓的眼中是十惡不赦的奸侫之臣。

然而，即使在當時，也有人並不同意這種說法。岳飛死後一年，有人作悼詩云:

『自古忠臣帝主疑，全忠全義不全屍。』

矛頭已經暗指趙構。宋亡之後，關於這樁公案的爭論紛起。明人高啟寫詩認為:

『每憶上方誰請劍，空嗟高廟自藏弓。』

文徵明的《滿江紅》中有這樣的詞句:

豈不念，中原蹙；
豈不惜，徽欽辱。
但徽欽既返，
此身何屬。
千古休誇南渡錯，
當時自怕中原復。
笑區區一檜亦何能，
逢其欲。

明確地指出高宗趙構才是殺害岳飛的元兇，秦檜充其量只是個幫兇而已。

秦檜為一己之私奉承主子的旨意，要害死岳飛是可以理解的。令人費解的是趙構為什麼要害死自己倚為軍事支柱的岳飛呢？而且宋太祖趙匡胤曾傳下秘密誓約，規定: 『不得殺士大夫及上書言事人』，『子孫有逾此誓者，天必殛之』。這條誓約在北宋歷朝，執行得非常嚴格，趙構何以敢違約破例？

一說認為『帝之忌兄，而不欲其歸』。高宗看到岳飛一心要『迎二聖』，而徽、欽兩帝回來，自己就當不成皇帝了。他害怕中原光復，因而殺了岳飛。另一說則認為『迎二聖』並不是高宗要殺岳飛的原因。趙構殺岳飛，主要原因是怕他久握重兵，跋扈難制。對武將的猜忌和防範，是趙宋王朝恪守不渝的家規。只要武將功大、官高而權重，就意味著對皇權構成威脅。

或者最後只能如文徵明般概歎:

拂拭殘碑，敕飛字依稀堪讀。
慨當初倚飛何重，後來何酷！
果是功成身合死，
可憐事去言難贖。
最無辜，堪恨更堪憐，風波獄。

　　

Piosenka Północy

How can a man escape life's sorrow and regret?
What limit is there to my solitary grief?
I returned to my homeland in a dream,
As I awakened, I shed tears in both of my eyes.
Who now will climb up those high towers,
I remember those sunny autumn scenes.
The past had lost its content,
And disappeared as in a dream.

人生愁恨何能免，銷魂獨我情何恨！
故『地』夢重歸，覺來雙淚垂。
高樓誰與上，長記秋晴望；
往事已成空，還似一夢中！

摘自『李煜．子夜歌』

　

Something without reward ...

If we are not working on something without reward, how to spend all our limited life.

全為實利打算，換言之，就是只要便宜。充其極端，做人全無感情，全無意氣，全無趣味，而人就變成枯燥，死板，冷酷，無情的一種動物。這就不是『生活』，而僅是一種『生存』了。古人有警句云：

『不為無益之事，何以遣有涯之生？』

（清項憶雲語）

這句話看似翻案好奇，卻含有人生的至理。無益之事，就是不為利害打算的事，就是由感情，意氣，趣味的要求而做的事。

摘自『豐子愷文選 Ⅲ』

　

Dream of Paladin ...

自古強豪多情種，
情怨纏身恨千重，
白首回顧空餘恨，
忘情棄愛不英雄？

寫於一九八一年十一月八日

無情未必真豪傑，
憐子如何不丈夫。
知否興風狂嘯者？
回眸時看小於菟。

摘自『魯迅‧答客誚』
寫於一九三二年十二月三十一日